Sunday, October 10, 2010

Two Birds With One Stadium, Blog 5 repost

Black and orange; the colors swam through my blood stream while my mother, an Orioles fanatic, prepared me for my first baseball game. We traveled from Arkansas to Maryland to watch. Fans flock from all over the country to see “The Birds” play at Camden Yards. Thus, the Orioles stadium provides a nostalgic, family-friendly event, and an All-American tradition of watching baseball, in a stadium that has been around for as long as families remember.
You can see the stadium from a mile away; you’ve almost reached “Bird Land.”  Though every person has a different experience, each person shares one thing: walking through the stadium gate that awaits the magic. My mother and I walked through hand-in-hand; the energy was electrifying. This memory, along with countless others created with family and friends, is one reason how the Orioles stadium creates nostalgia. Not only do you remember the game itself, but you recall the path that paved that memory: the journey through the gate.
Camden Yards gathers people from all backgrounds because of the love for an All-American sport. Everyone energetically fills the stadium, feeding off of each other's energy. Camden Yards gives fans of all kinds a place to congregate and enjoy the game together.  
My mother and I rooted the Orioles to victory and we have been cheering ever since. Moments like these shape our lives. With all of the changes that people are challenged with, Camden Yards has remained, creating a sense of stability in an all-changing world.

Word Count: 250

1 comment:

  1. Another Orioles fan!? Awesome! There aren't many of us around these days :/

    Some suggestions:

    "in a stadium that has been around for as long as families remember."
    you may want to edit this since the stadium only opened in 1992.

    Awkward sentence: "Camden Yards gives fans of all kinds a place to congregate and enjoy the game together."

    Just some small grammar issues.
    "Thus, the Orioles stadium provides"
    it should read: "Thus, the Orioles' stadium provides" Orioles is possessing the stadium. (you make this error a few times throughout the post)

    with a couple read-throughs i think this post will be much better.

    ReplyDelete